Sometimes life sucks
by Darkbeast42
Summary: A series of one shots in which I narrate situations in the leaf village no one wants to experience.


**I own nothing**

This is just something I decided to do between chapters for my stories. I realize this isn't that funny but I'm bored so I thought 'why not?'

This chapter was inspired by all the fanfics where Naruto's parents can talk to him with a mental link. I don't think people realize just how much that would suck.

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**Chapter 1: Voices**

A twelve-year-old Naruto walked towards his bed exhausted. He had just gotten back from two back to back C ranked missions away from the village in less than a week. Now that he was back home it was time to stay in bed for a few days and enjoy his time off before the next mission. Once his head hit the pillow he was out like a light.

**Dream scape**

Naruto awoke in an empty clearing in some forest he didn't recognize. Once he was fully conscious Naruto quickly looked around for any and all threats. He froze at the sight of a giant nine tailed fox in a wooden cage. "Kyuubi?" Naruto asked warily.

The fox looked irritated and gave the blond boy a quick glare before responding. "Oh look he remembered me I feel _soooo _special." The beast spoke sarcastically.

"Don't mind him." A feminine voice spoke behind Naruto. The boy spun around and came to the sight of a red-headed women and the fourth Hokage. "He's just a little angry about the whole 'sealing' thing."

The dumb founded Naruto turned back to the fox when it spoke again. "A little angry? I've been in this cramp cage for the past twelve years, before this I was chained to a rock, you don't even want to know what it was like in Mito, and the sage of six paths started to go senile in his final years. I'm down right pissed with my life."

"The sage of six paths went senile?" The Hokage asked.

"Yeah he thought teaching people to breath fire and shoot lightning would lead to peace. And then he just sent me and my siblings into the world even though he knew we would more than likely be used as weapons." The Kyuubi explained.

"Ummmmm what's going on?" Naruto asked and everyone turned to him remembering he was there.

"Oh that's right!" Kushina exclaimed. "Look to make a long story short Minato here..."

"Yo"

"Sealed the fox and the two of us into you when you were born. We were held in a different part of the seal for a while but since you were so tired the chakra in your seal weakened and we altered it so we could talk to you. We can now communicate anytime time we want to but unfortunately so can the fox." At the end of the explanation Naruto was even more confused.

"Okay but who are you?"

"Oh we're your parents." Kushina answered with a smile.

Naruto's jaw dropped. "Wait really?"

This time it was Minato who responded. "Yeah but we can talk more about it tomorrow. Go to bed for now."

The next thing Naruto knew his world grew dark and he went back to his normal state of sleep.

**Morning**

'Naruto it's time to get up.' Kushina chimed.

'Let him sleep Kushina.'

'But I'm bored'

'Will you two shut up the brat's not the only one trying to sleep.' Kyuubi growled.

'Fine I guess I can let him NARUTO WAKE UP!' The women roared.

Naruto shot out of his bed on full alert.

'It's time to get up sweetie.'

'Was that really necessary?' Minato asked.

"Can you guys stop?" Naruto asked.

'it was totally necessary I was bored.'

Naruto sweat dropped as everyone ignored him.

**Breakfast**

'Really Naruto? Ramen for breakfast?' Minato asked.

"What? it's the greatest food known to man." Naruto responded unaware of the look he was getting from Teuchi and Ayame.

'Yeah lay off Minato everyone should eat ramen.'

'Do you realize how unhealthy it is?'

'Then why did you eat it everyday?'

'Because you forced me to.' Minato muttered.

'What did you say?' Kushina asked in a warning tone.

'Nothing!' Minato squeaked.

'Hey Naruto if you release me and I'll make ramen the official food of my empire when I conquer the world.' Kyuubi offered.

'Naruto you have to release him.' Kushina told him in excitement.

'NO DON'T DO IT!" Minato shouted.

Once again Naruto can't get a word in between his parents bickering.

**Dinner**

Naruto sat with the other Genin at the B.B.Q. restaurant. It was peaceful for a while until the voices in his head started speaking again.

'Naruto sit up straight.' His mother commanded.

Naruto quickly obeyed.

'Good now this is the perfect opportunity to ask out that pink haired girl.' Kushina squealed.

Naruto blushed at the thought of his crush but remained silent afraid of looking stupid.

'I think he should ask out that Yamanaka girl. I always thought blond hair and blue eyes were attractive on a girl.' Their was silence for a moment before Minato quickly added, 'But not as attractive as you dear.'

Naruto's gaze shifted to the Ino and considered his father's words.

'Your both wrong. That Hyuga girl will be much more willing to let Naruto have his way.' The fox commented.

Naruto quickly turned to look at Hinata and heavily blushed at what the fox was implying.

'Don't be a pervert Naruto.' Kushina scolded. 'Sakura is the best person to date there's something about her personality I like.'

The voices kept increasing in volume as the argument escalated.

'Sakura.'

'Ino.'

'Hyuga.'

'Sakura!'

'Ino!'

'Hyuga!'

"WILL YOU ALL SHUT UP!" Naruto yelled.

Everyone in the restaurant turned and stared at the blond boy like he was crazy.

"Are you okay Naruto?" Kiba asked worried.

"Yeah I'm just tire." Naruto lied and ran out the restaurant.

'Nice save.' The Kyuubi chuckled.

"Shut it."

**That night**

"You guys need to be quiet." Naruto told the voices.

'It's not our fault you yelled in the middle of public.' Minato chided.

"Yes it is!" Naruto growled.

'Don't talk to your father like that.' Kushina scolded

"Be quite!" Naruto roared.

'That's it! Go to your room!' His mother commanded.

"You're just a voice in my head! I don't have to listen to you!"

'I said. Go. To. Your. Room.'

Naruto was going to argue some more but something in his mother's voice made him obey. The boy stormed off into his room and slammed the door behind him. He jumped in his bed and buried his face into the pillow.

'You do remember that we're in your head right?' The fox asked.

"I realized."

**2:00 AM**

Naruto lied awake staring at the ceiling. This was perhaps the worst thing Naruto had ever experienced. No mater what Naruto tried to do he couldn't drown out the moans that were coming from his parents as they made up for the past twelve years they were separated in the seal.

**One weak later**

It had been a week since the voices in Naruto's head began speaking. A week since Naruto was convinced he finally snapped from the pressure that accompanied the ninja life style. He got no sleep or a break. The voices were non-stop and Naruto had enough.

Entering his mindscape Naruto grinned at the hog tied and gaged formers of his parents and the Kyuubi. It may have been cruel but Naruto stopped caring six and a half days ago.


End file.
